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The Best Thing In The World
By Oona King
When
I see black people who would rather a black baby died than be brought
up by a white family in the UK, I also see how much racism still cripples
our capacity for sound judgment.
I have some experience of the confusion
that 'dual heritage' families can create. My father was African-American,
from Georgia in the US; my mother was a white Geordie. So no one ever
thought I was my mother's daughter. Although we have similar features,
they never saw past our different colours. It can be difficult, but my
mum always told me to thank my lucky stars I had nice brown legs that
didn't go a motley blue in the cold.
There are pitfalls ahead for any adoptive family, and mine will be no
different. But already I have gained immeasurably from Ilya, who has
saved me from a life I did not want.
He makes me laugh all the time. Even when he throws his food on the floor
or hides my keys in the washing machine, he's still the best thing in my
world. I don't even mind when other mums say: 'Well done - you've nearly
lost all that weight from your pregnancy.'
In fact the past few months have strengthened my determination to adopt
from Africa and when my family is ready I will renew my attempt to overcome
the obstacles.
One of these is the climate of criticism against trans-racial and international
adoption. My views are frequently opposed, particularly by some in the
black community. It is said, for example, that I should be concentrating
on the bigger issues - the grinding hardship and the lack of a fair trade
structure.
Well, yes, it is true that many black people, including myself, are descended
from slaves. But poverty remains the biggest issue for David Banda's family,
much of it is caused by patterns of inequality that date from colonialism.
But when I see black people who would rather a black baby died than be
brought up by a white family in the UK, I also see how much racism still
cripples our capacity for sound judgment.
We would not even be thinking about the countless African orphans but for
Madonna's intervention. Inter-country adoption should not be the preserve
of the well-off or the famous. To see it as no more than a celebrity fad
is a tragedy for everyone. For thousands of destitute children it is a
matter of life and death.
Source:Thisislondon.co.uk
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